Friday, 14 May 2010

Tie-ins are knot good

Welcome to another moan.
For this moan I have just gotten pissed off over using the last tea bag and am listening to Anderson, Bruford, Wakeman, Howe's self titled album. Ok its not aggressive music as a matter of fact its damn good. So anyway its time to “Get my moan on” in one that is completely different from what I was writing earlier in the week
Right so movie/TV games its safe to say there are a lot of them, but are they any good? For the most part the answer is a big old “NO”. So why are they so crap? Well more often than not they are rushed out to make the release date of a film to make a couple extra quid and there lies the problem. Games should never be rushed out. As then they end up as annoying bug feasts of crap, but wait we are in the download age so now when comes out and it has a bug on it later on when the company in question are arsed they release a patch to make everything better. What of a simple matter of testing that sodding thing before it comes out? Oh wait no time for that just put the game in the slot press start and play about five minutes then pass it. (im not getting at testers here. They have a hard enough job as it is).
I think the Wii has the hardest time of all. Well think about it. Its easy for them to make a mini game pack, tag on waggle control's and make it out just in time for another shitty Cgi film that's now probably in “3D”. Go on I dare you to look at what's on at the cinema I bet there's one on there right now. Its become way to easy for them to make these “Films” now. Back a few years ago it was great now its bloody shite. Thank you Hayao Miyazaki for still doing things the traditional way and still having something that looks like its not a soulless shameless product placement feast of shite so there kids can annoy there parents to buy the toys, the clothes, the cereal, the games and go to Mc Donalds so they can have the Happy meal with the shitty little toys that probably break as soon as they get them home.
Ok im being a bit negative here there are examples of a “good” game based on a film and here seems to be the catch, but I wont spoil it for you have a look at these names.
-Ghostbusters – PS3/360/Wii/PS2 (ok maybe not as much that version)
-Goldeneye – N64 (Ok I don't really like it, but people do)
-Alien vs Predator – Jaguar/Arcade (different game)
-Aliens – Arcade
-Alien trilogy – PC/PSone/Saturn
-Die Hard Arcade – Saturn
-Xmen Children of the atom – Arcade/Saturn/PSone
There are seven.
Why am I mentioning them? Well they (for the most part) came out after the film there based off. Ok apart from the first Alien vs Predator games they came out years before and reverses this little rule.
There where also a load of great games based off Disney cartoons from the 80s/90s (Duck Tails and Darkwing duck to name two) and there's something about these. Oh wait there all by Capcom, Capcom used to do a load of movie games in fact look at the seven examples three of them are by Capcom.
And then theres the worst TV/Movie tie ins.
Superman – N64 – Ok this cam out years after and it based on the cartoon series.
ET – Regarded as one of the worst games ever
Supergran – Spectrum/c64/Amstrad CPC (Warning name may be lost on those of you not from the UK).
So if they are meant to be bad who keeps buying them?
Look at the parents of those kids. Them kids get brainwashed by these new kids films and so get there parents to buy them.
Then theres that bloke that I keep mentioning. The ill informed sod. He watches avatar and thinks that the game will be the same and hes right for the most part they are both shite.
And yet look at one of the children's movie makers I have mentioned.
Hayao Miyazaki he has siad that he doscent want games based on film works and yet there are a few references to his works in games
I wont plead to these big company's to stop it as they wont listen. They never listen to people requests.
Anyway I have typed my peace on this subject.
I am kinda running out of things to moan about. So I might have a generic “Suggestions” post some time soon.

On another note
If you type “Moaning sod” into google im the top five web sites.
Not bad considering I CLOSED ONE OF THEM!!!!

I am also going to be working on a “How to get your moan on” soonish


  1. Yep, it's true, they do usually suck arse. I generally steer clear of them unless I know for sure they suck little or no arse. Goldeneye is the obvious good one, which I also like a lot. Also liked Alien Trilogy, but can't think of many more...

  2. Spiderman 2 was pretty decent. Everything else I've seen has been utter toilet though.